I’ve been having intermittent pain since my procedure a month ago. The pain isn’t exactly in the same place as it was, with one exception. I still feel complaints in the area of my left ovary. But, a lot of the pain has migrated to the bottom of my uterus.

I’ve been telling myself, “ Oh, it’s mostly here because I didn’t take off enough time after the surgery. I took off for the day it was done which was, May 5th, and I took off the next day. I had read that normally it takes a few days to heal. Then I kept finding information online that said some women might need a full week off from work.

This, I kept rationalizing that my healing was being delayed because I hadn’t stayed away from work long enough. Also, because we are very short staffed on the front end, and I seem to be the only one who can do the 8:30-3,4 shifts~and there is only one scheduled- I’ve felt guilty calling out. We have a total of NINE cashiers and four of them are head cashiers, to cover every shift fir a full seven days. We’re hurting.

Last night, around midnight (which would technically make it today), I mentally smacked myself in the head and said,” What the hell are you thinking? You deserve to be healthy. What if something REALLY is wrong?” I barely slept over worrying. Not, just over the pain, but the thought that I am going to be judged at work for, yet, something else.

It’s been a total surprise to me that my immediate front end supervisor died not seem to like me. my co-workers keep repeating that she’s like that with all her, “underlines.” People usually do like me-and easily. However, I reached the point where I couldn’t keep this emotion from interfering with my healthcare.

At 5-something in the morning I called to talk to a manager to call out. The woman who answered said a manager would not be in till 7. We are supposed to give two hours notice in calling out. That didn’t give me enough time as my shift started at 8:30. That was going to have to suffice.

I fell back asleep and didn’t hear my 7:00 alarm, or I did and unconsciously shut it off. I awoke just before 8:00 am immediately called Sprouts. The female manager sounded ok with it. The first woman I called probably clued her in on my attempt to call out due to my surgery pain not being normal.

Shit. I just realized the time. It’s 3:58. My doctor is ten minutes away. I’m not putting on anything special. I feel too crappy anyway.

More later.