Friday the 13th adventures

I had my hospital-referred orthopedic appointment yesterday at 11:30 am. How dare I think it was early enough in the day to get it done and get home and do some more accident-related chores. Ha!

It started out with Lyft weirdness. Usually, when I go to my Lyft app, I summon a ride and a driver will be there within five minutes. Usually, I don’t need pick up that quickly.

I had to arrive about 30 minutes before my appointment to fill in a bunch of info on an iPad. Gawd, those things make life so easy for patients. I have a couple of doctors who employ them. It is so much quicker. Thus, I wanted to arrive at Rothman Orthopaedics at 11 am.

At about 10:10 am I opened my app and requested the ride to Winter Park. The app clearly lied by saying I would get picked up by 10:38 when it simultaneously hadn’t found a driver yet. That went on for about ten more minutes. Finally, I got a driver and was informed I would arrive at the doctor’s at 11:03. Ok, I can live with that.

I got picked up at about 10:48 and at 11:03 was barely halfway there. Then, the driver’s computer voice directions deviated significantly from the route my app gave me. I had to verbally correct this at least twice. When I finally got there, the driver had been instructed to drop me off at the building’s rear. There were no street addresses anywhere. I wasn’t even sure I was at the right place. Thankfully, there was another woman just outside who had a name badge on a lanyard around her neck. I asked her, “Is this 255 Lakemont?” She confirmed that it was. Only then did I get out of the car.

Holy cow, I was stressed enough about what was happening. I wasn’t even sure if I was supposed to fork over money for this visit, or if my auto insurance covered everything. I’ve never been in this situation. It was foreign territory to me. I didn’t need ride-share stress too.

Once I got into the orthopaedic’s office, I discovered that everyone was extremely nice and helpful. The office decor, however, was sterile. The colors reflected the practice’s logo: navy blue, light gray and gold. I felt like I was in Scandinavia and it was a bit unnerving. I love the blue, but there was something anxiety-inducing about the color combination and utilitarian looking chairs. More earthy surroundings are much more calming: deep greens, brown tones and nothing whiter than ivory. I think the lack of foliage bothered me.

The x-ray portion didn’t take so long and I was completely impressed by the tech’s knowledge at telling me exactly how to stand or sit and position my body to get accurate images. I think x-raying the upper body is trickier than doing just legs or just an arm or just hips. I had to twist around more, or so it seemed, I asked, “How long does it take to memorize all the different ways to position people for x-rays?” “Well, there are over 600 positions, so it takes awhile.” Holy crap, do the doctors have to learn this too? I thought.

It blows me away the sheer amounts of things doctors and nurses have to learn and memorize. I know there are tricks to associate A to B to C that help you recall D. This is one place where creativity comes into play-thinking up personal strategies to get to the information you need. Successful science is as creative an endeavor as writing a song, or painting a portrait.

I waited there longer than I spent talking to professionals about my injury and medical history. I only started to mind it when my phone’s battery started to get into the 40% zone. I hadn’t grabbed a charger. So, I had to turn off my phone a few times to save battery space to summon a Lyft ride home.

Finally I got taken to exam room #8. Great, number of abundance. Am I going to have to fork over a fortune, or is one headed to me? Just kidding. Numerology is fun and interesting, but I only play with it. It’s the anthropologist in me.

I swear I thought I was going to go insane waiting in that navy and gray room after the nurse came in and double checked all my info. Again, she was also very nice.

Then I heard scraping noises on the door and an extremely tall, masked man with a shaved head entered. He was friendly and very nice. This was Michael Hawks MD. He was probably about 33. He seemed familiar; he was probably a Sprouts customer. It’s about a block and a half away.

He sat on the stool and asked, “How are you doing?” “Ok, considering, but I sorta feel like I’m cheating on my regular orthopedic.” He busted out laughing. “Who is that!” “Ron Hudanich.” With mirth in his voice he said, “Oh, I know him!. We have the same hairstyle.” Dr. Ron used to shave his head. “Actually, the last time I saw him, in May, comparatively speaking, he had hippie hair.” “Really?” I didn’t tell him that I secretly believed maybe he grew his hair back to look even LESS like Jeff Bezos. He really dosen’t look like Bezos, but hey, I have no idea how he sees himself. It seems Dr. Ron has a reputation of being the black sheep of the orthopedic family. Whenever I’m around medical professionals and his name comes up, people react as if they find him amusing. I can see that; he’s nuts-in a good way. I’ve lost count of the doctors and nurses I’ve met who say that he’s an excellent surgeon. I’m always equally relieved when others say positive things about my other doctors.

Then he told me what was going on with my shoulder: fracture and torn rotator cuff. Yay. I’ll be doing physical therapy three times a week. I can pick my own rehab place. I guess I will try Ability Rehab in Oviedo. That’s who I used after my knee replacement. With my transportation issue, I might be able to get the therapist to come to my house.

I also learned I do not have to wear that annoying arm sling at home. But, he wants me to wear it when I go out in public. That was good news since it needed a bath. It has to be washed by hand and hung dry. It’s hanging right now. The point is to not let the shoulder get stiff. I really can’t get into specifics because of the lawsuit.

I am glad that he didn’t give me another round of methylprednisone. I hate that stuff. I hate being extremely exhausted and simultaneously wired. Maybe that’s why I never got into cocaine, besides not wanting to die. I’ve taken cocaine twice in my life, both times in the 80’s, and I loathed it.

I have a follow up appointment on September 24th with Dr. Hawks’ ARNP. Monday I’m going to set up my PT. I have a ride to my dermatology appointment on Monday. Maybe my friend won’t mind making an extra stop in Oviedo.

Next I walked to Sprouts to get bagels and a couple of other things. That was another adventure in stress, but I’m pretty pooped. I’ll have continue this tomorrow.

After my Sprouts excitement and my $17 Lyft ride, I arrived home after 3:00 pm and I was pooped.

It’s 9:10 pm in Florida right now. I was up till 5 am. I am done with the methylprednisone; I’m hoping I can get to bed at a decent hour.

You all have a good night.🌙⭐️🌙

And, so I feel less like I’m cheating, please visit my regular orthopedic’s website.

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